It’s easy (most of the time) for me to coach others. I truly hate when I have to coach myself. I talk a lot about having an open mind and being willing to try new things. I ask team members, leaders, co-workers and all kinds of people to just give things a chance. These concepts apply to me too. As I go through my own changes, I need to coach myself and remember openness, only courage, trust, focus and respect. It’s not an easy thing to do though and I’m reminded, again, about how difficult change really is.
When coaching, I am able to see situations from a different perspective and, because I have the understanding I have, offer insight and advice. When I’m just living my life my perspective isn’t very objective and it’s difficult to think through how to apply my understanding to my situation. As I go through this change, I find I’m constantly challenged to just stop, wait and process information before I react. My project management roots run very deep in my personal life and I have expectations and plans for how everything should work but, sometimes it doesn’t and I’m forced to remember that value “Responding to Change OVER Following a Plan”. My plans are pretty good though and WOW life would be smooth if everything went according to it. The odds are pretty good too that, even though it’s not going as expected, it will probably all turn out just fine.
Today, I took some time to assess what I was feeling. I wrote down what was bothering me. Then, I thought about WHY it was bothering me. Finally, I assessed whether or not any of the bothers are in my control. For the ones that are, I started thinking what action I would take. Does all of this sound like a retro? It was. It was my own personal retro. It worked too! I have solid actions I can take which will keep my focus where it belongs. I should mention a crucial piece of data was my personal vision. Having that really helped me hone in on what the most important items are.
Finally, for any of you who may have going or are going through something similar, I’m reminded it’s not easy for most people to coach themselves and it’s OK to have your own, persona,l coaching moment. What’s not OK is not taking the necessary time for reflection and allowing the squishiness to continue.